For me, a loaded question...

I have a hard time answering this question:

"How many kids do you have?"

Now, I can add. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7. I have 7. Four boys, 3 girls. And it's not like my memory is that bad, I don't generally forget that little tidbit of information. It's just that...well, for me, that question is a loaded one. If I answer that question, generally 2 things happen that I am not really happy with:

1) I become "the woman with the 7 kids." From that moment on, that is how I am defined. I walk into a PTO meeting, a book group, the grocery store--and that is my introduction. "This is happymommy, she's the one with 7 kids!!!" Now, I adore my children and had each and every one of them because I wanted to, so I don't mind being defined as their mother; however, I mind being defined ONLY as their mother. I am a complex, multi-faceted woman, people!! Come on!

2) I become sort of unapproachable to moms with less children than me. I have had so many conversations with other moms that start out, "I know you probably think I am just silly for having this problem..." as though, because I have 7 children, I have never had a problem. Excuse me? I was having a nice little conversation with an aquaintance at church while we nursed our babies one Sunday in the mother's lounge. She was talking to me about some struggles she was having, and I was just enjoying listening to her. Suddenly, she gets a horrified look on her face and says, "Oh, like I can EVEN complain to YOU! I must sound so whiny and stupid to you!!" Nope. You just sound like a fellow mommy.

So, now you know why I hestitate to answer that question. It changes things.