Tuesday, August 19, 2008
I never really wanted boys. [I never thought I wanted kids actually, but that's a story for another day.] I kind of looked at boys as loud, wrestly, superhero-obsessed creatures with which I had nothing in common. The idea of mothering boys seemed, on its best day, not much fun.
Now I have 4 boys. Thanks, Heavenly Father. Don't you just love His sense of humor?
So, I've discovered something. Boys are amazing. Boys are especially amazing to their mothers. My boys are very tender-hearted and kind to me. They all have been very tuned into how I am feeling, since they were little. And take it upon themselves to try and make sure that Mommy is doing well.
I remember when my my 3rd son was 2. He would climb up on my lap, take my cheeks in his little chubby hands, look me square in the eye, and say, "Happy? Mommy? Happy Mommy?" I get my screen name here from that little exchange.
My boys also have a great desire to please me. While my girls seemed to come out of the womb ready to do the exact opposite of what I'd like them to do, my boys are very pliable and willing. In fact, so much so that I must be careful. I have to watch how much I tell my oldest son, now nearly 16, about what I think he should do. Whether it be classes to take, clothes to wear, the kinds of things that aren't about right or wrong but simply preference. He will nearly always do what I suggest. So, I have learned to work with him in questions, asking him what he thinks, what he likes. I'll rarely say what I think he should do about things, because I don't want him to become accustomed to listening to a voice outside himself to decide what he is going to do.
I have found that raising boys is raising men, and I like the feeling of that. I like to think that my 4 boys will grow up to be the kind of men I'd like my girls to marry. I trust that my friends with boys are doing the same thing. My hope is that I will teach them to work hard, play hard, love God, cherish and protect the women in their lives, and teach their future boys to do the same.
They are still loud, VERY wrestly, and superhero obsessed...but somehow I'm okay with that.