How come my kids wanna fight to the death over who gets to sit in certain places?
It's not like their dad and I model this behavior. They've never once seen me burst into tears because their Dad sat down at a particular chair at the dining room table. They haven't ever walked in on Dad and Mom pushing and shoving each other for a place on the couch. And I'm pretty sure their Dad hasn't ever thrown himself to the ground and kicked and screamed because Mom was riding shotgun.
And yet, here's an actual conversation:
"I call pistol!" (pistol is the seat behind shotgun. the fact that they've taken it upon themselves to name it that shows you just what kind of freaks we are dealing with)
"Too late!! I already called it!"
---weeping, wailing, gnashing of teeth---
"No way!!! I was totally here by the door and I called it!!!!"
"Ahhhhhh, but see?? I called it first, IN MY MIND."